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No Elf On Our Shelf

Call me a Scrooge, but…

We do NOT have an elf on our shelf in our house.

❌ Hell no.

(If you have an elf on the shelf and it brings joy and magic to your whole family, just skip this, it isn’t for you.)

I don’t need one more thing to keep track of during the holidays, and I don’t want my kids behaving solely because of the constant threat of the elf catching them.

Believe me, I know:

🥕 Kids WILL behave to get a new toy or to avoid losing screen time.

🦴 Just like a dog goes in her kennel to get a treat or stays in the yard to avoid a shock.

💞 Can we agree that our kids deserve more in life, like relationships built on trust and internal motivation with a strong ethical compass?

Watch the video below (no Instagram account required) to see how yes, even I can succumb to bribes when I’m not at my parenting best, and why in my heart I actually don’t want the bribe to work:

Bribes create a quick “win” and eventually train your child to ignore what they need and who they are.

Did you know that’s what is really happening with bribes? #childhoodtrauma

If you are down with ditching bribes and threats, toss a 🌟 in the comments below.

Ready to learn what’s possible INSTEAD of bribes and threats?

Join my weekly newsletter to start learning how to parent with trust and acceptance.

💜 Allyn


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I'm Allyn

Wife, mom, and parent coach

Thanks for stopping by to check out this post.


I'm on a mission to show you how to thrive in the toddler years and beyond, with less fighting and more fun.


Use any of the links below the post to connect with me and learn about my Pause~Presence~Play parenting method. 

I'm here to help you be the parent you want to be, on your terms.

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